Hello xx (I don't even know who is reading this, since this blog has been dead for >1 year!)
It's a public holiday toady - Labour Day. And since I am bored, I thought I shall write something and try and bring back that little piece of hobby I used to have.
We are in the middle of the coronavirus pandemic right now, and Singapore is under "lockdown" mode - we're not allowed to leave the house unless it's to exercise (alone) or do essential stuff eg. grocery shopping. It's a tough time - boring mostly, but at least we're healthy and I have a job,
Oh boy, I started this blog since 2014 when I was in NUS and things have changed so much for me since then. Let me try and summarize some highlights
1) I am a working adult now.
I like (mostly) what I do, and I am earning enough to make myself happy. I think working world is a whole new ball game - your relationships with people are important and there is a lot lesser time for yourself. I used to have these semester breaks where I can just shut down and gallivant around. There's no such thing after you start working full-time. It's either limited annual leaves, or making the choice to slack off during work (which usually comes with guilt shortly after haha).
I would say I am doing pretty ok at work. I am motivated (most of the time), and I just got promoted not too long ago. A rather accelerated promotion - which hopefully means I am surpassing expectations! I earn significantly more than my average peer, and I am comfortable with this lifestyle. The financial freedom helps A LOT, and I guess brings new experiences as well.
2) My social circle changed a lot.
My closest friends now are 8-11 years older than me, and people I met from work. The age gap is (almost) unnoticeable most of the time, but when it comes glaring at you in the face - I sometimes wonder whether I need to start going back to hang out with people of my age group. I love my older sisters, but I also think we are at different places in our lives. While they have already gone through what I went through, I am still making the mistakes they used to made and still very playful. I am trying hard to grow up faster and match their pace, but I also want to enjoy whatever being 25 should bring.
I distanced away from the friends that I used to hang out with so much, and I do miss them. But I also feel this invisible wall that's hanging there which makes it hard to cross. I think it's because we used to have something in common (eg. school) to bring us together, but now that it has sunsetted, there are lesser reasons to naturally meet up. An excuse - but being busy with work has also got into the way. These friends fall down in the priority list, and it's quite sad to think about it. So I just wish they are happy in their lives, and if God plans for it in that manner - we will come back together again one day.
3) Me now
I feel.. OK. Not super fantastic, but enough for me to feel like I can get back. I don't think I am anything amazing, but I do count myself blessed. I need to work on my bad traits - like being stubborn and impatient. And I want to be a kinder person.
Ok, that's all for today hehe. Can't wait for coronavirus to end so that I can travel again :)
Love,
Xinhui
